Jude's Happiness vs. Mom's Sanity

This morning when I dropped the boys off at school, Jude's teacher, who happens to be helping run the Upward basketball program that Simon is playing this winter, asked me if it would be okay to get Jude a t-shirt and a pair of pom-poms and stick him out on the floor with the cheer team. She said it's all girls, but he would have a blast and it would be a way for him to participate. He is in no way ready for basketball--Simon barely is.

My initial reaction:  Hells,no.  I'll likely think about it for a few days and talk to Steve and still conclude no.  Do I really want to have to pop a Xanax on the way to each of the games?  Would Jude have fun and be adorable out there? Well, sure.  But would he also be whacking the other girls on the head with his megaphone and running out onto the floor in the middle of the game? Um, yeah. He would.  Also, there's this thing I have about feeling sometimes that Jude is on display, that all of us are.  Sometimes I don't think it's all bad to protect ourselves from that.  Everything can't be about what is "fun" for Jude. Sometimes what is tolerable for me has to factor in, too.

I told Jude's teacher this morning that I would get back to her, but I can't imagine that we'll do it.  I don't want her to think that we intend to make Jude a spectator his whole life. I did mention that he had done t-ball on the typical community league last summer right alongside Simon and that it had gone okay. I didn't mention how after the first game I told my neighbor that I would need to do waaaay more drinking before the next game.  When baseball becomes coach-pitched this summer, we intend to sign Jude up for the "Dream Team" instead, which is a t-ball league designed for children with disabilities.  When he turns 7, there's Special Olympics, too.  There are all kinds of possibilities out there for Jude. As much as is possible, I'd like him to participate in sports at school, too.  I have heard about kids with Down syndrome on their school's track and cross country, golf, and swim teams.  We have no plans to limit his participation in life to the friggin' full-tilt fullest that is Jude!  But Upward cheer?  Now? Probably not.